The captain announced, “We are crossing the Rocky Mountains. If you’ll look to the south, out to your left, you will see a ski area in the distance. That is Angel Fire... We will be flying directly over Taos, New Mexico.” Suddenly a rush of emotion came over me as I looked out the window and thought back of the memories created there almost 20 years ago with my young family. It seems like yesterday, truly.

I remember a snow mobile tour through one of the most beautiful natural areas I ever remember visiting, heavy fallen snow amidst evergreens laden with the snow and Rocky Mountains framing the picture. I recall the extraordinary silence when we stopped and turned off our engines and took a moment to savor the peace and beauty of nature around us in this forest.

I also remember my son getting snow in his boots and crying because his feet were wet and cold... getting back to the van and stripping him down from the layers of snow clothing to his “polypropylene” underwear/socks, which had somehow gotten wet as well. I remember the frustration and then the laughter as we struggled to “hurry up” for dad and the laughter that happens when little boys find a word they like, like “polypropylene” and say it over and over.

I remember ski lessons the boys took at Kids Ski School at Taos and how proud we all were of their accomplishments. I also remember the pain of falling backwards on the bunny slope in my own ski school and having them carry me off the slope to the first aide area!! Ouch!

I remember the video tape we took of driving up to Taos the second day, talking about how they learned to make a pizza wedge to stop, in their little boy voices, and how excited they were to go again. Capturing this with our leased camcorder, on the way up the mountain, of the boys, the snow lined streams, and evergreens turned out to be priceless!

The plane crossed over the Royal Gorge... yet another memory. The temperature was around 0 and we had heard the bridge over the gorge was a must see. We parked and ran to the bridge... I have NEVER experienced the kind of cold I felt in a matter of seconds. The wind was whipping and I thought that if I had stayed a second longer, I would be frozen in time (must have been many, many degrees below zero). We shrieked as we ran back to the warm car, laughing and talking in amazement of the gorge.

How lucky and grateful I feel to have had these experiences. No accomplishment, and I venture to say, nothing, can come close to the experience of raising a family. I will always be a mom first, no matter how far away my boys are physically... my heart and soul are with them every second of every day! I am on my way to California to lead a workshop, then to Denver for another presentation, and then off to Dublin, Ireland, for yet another. I’m excited about all the new adventures and memories that will be created, but I doubt any will ever come close to those I had raising my boys.

I have not written in my blog since the first of summer. It has been busy, filled with incredible moments. Maybe I will document them soon in one way or another... or not. Perhaps it will be 20 years before I take the time to write them down. :-)

Action step: Positive psychologists tell us that positive reminiscing and gratitude can shift our moods and be used to build positive emotion. Build a treasure chest that you can dive into when needing a boost, by keeping either a list of some of these memories or a group of photos at your desk or on your computer. Change them out on a regular basis! Happy reminiscing!

There are times in our lives that we meet people who are so remarkable, we can’t stop talking about them. There are people we want the world to know about. My friend, Suzanne Lindley, is one of those people. Suzanne inspires hope in all those who are fortunate enough to be in her life. I wanted to share that hope in the form of an interview with her, so more could experience it. The interview is around 30 minutes, not near enough to detail the many pieces of what makes her remarkable, yet hopefully enough to inspire HOPE, her middle name. Instead of a boring TV show tonight, consider an investment in a motivational story that will inspire you to live life more fully!

As you will hear, her story is one of LIVING, in spite of great obstacles and medical prognosis. It is one of taking charge of the life we have all been given; being empowered as a patient, and then going about the business of living fully. As a hat she wears says, “I am terminal,” and on the back, “... and so are you.” None of us knows how much more time we have on this earth. Appreciating each breath that life gives us and making the most of it, is what she is all about.

Click here for the interview

In Addition:
• In the interview Suzanne mentions her non-profit. The link to her YES organization’s website is : www.beatlivertumors.org
• She also speaks a lot about a resource that has been particularly helpful for her: ACOR or Association of Cancer Online Resources or acor.org
• March is colon cancer awareness month! Colorectal screening can save your life. The Colorectal Cancer Coalition or C3, has a very clear message: Cover Your Butt. Learn more about early detection by clicking here.
• Read some of Suzannes’s blog posts on www.SurvivorCelebration.com -she is an incredible writer!
• Suzanne: Congressional Record Katie Couric Interview transcript
• Other important resources:
American Cancer Society www.cancer.org
Imerman Angels www.imermanangels.org
The Lance Armstrong Foundation www.livestrong.org
National Coalition for Cancer Survivorship www.canceradvocacy.org

See previous blogs regarding Signature Strengths and how using them can improve happiness.

My husband and I are known for our spontaneous vacations-due in part to his very unpredictable business. We rarely plan far in advance. But this past weekend we did what felt like the ultimate in spontaneity. Staring at the unknown of recovery from upcoming major surgery, we decided to have one last hurrah for the summer on Tuesday (we left Friday). We had special tickets we’d been holding onto for just such a moment. In looking at SW Airlines destinations, about the only place I had always wanted to go but never had been, was Los Angeles/Hollywood.

At the very moment I was making reservations, little did I know, LA was having its first major quake in 10 years. The news about aftershocks was scary. Could this be a precurser for the BIG one? A feeling of fear came over me. Then another stronger feeling. Courage. We are going! You only live once! Zest! Since I was little, I had been intrigued by Hollywood and being an actress. Here was my chance to see the epicenter of acting. Millions live there, in spite of the earthquakes. If they can do it, I can. You see, at 40 years young, I took acting lessons (CREATIVITY) at an urging from a close friend who had Stage IV breast cancer. I now have an agent, and do occasional commercials, industrials, independent film or theatre, here in NC. Its small time, but most importantly, its about doing what you love!

So when we arrived, we rented a car and proceeded to discover Los Angeles. BRAVERY :-) CURIOSITY
First stop, Bevery Hills Hotel for lunch. No, we didn’t plan it! We just happened to come upon it as we headed to Hollywood. It took a little courage to walk in this swanky place, but so glad we did. It was beautiful, from the bathrooms, to the cabanas at the pool, to the outdoor restaurant covered in bougainvillea! Appreciation of Beauty


WOW.

Then onto Hollywood Blvd. to see all it offered. I was stabbed by some strange characters in front of Grauman’s Chinese Theatre.

Here are Jane Russel and Marilyn Monroe’s imprints:

We stayed until we couldn’t walk another step down Hollywood Blvd.

The next day we woke up and decided to drive up the coastline. We’d heard Santa Barbara was beautiful. We knew nothing of what we would encounter. CURIOSITY We fell in love immediately with the beautiful cove/beach, ocean view restaurants and outdoor patios, with a sidewalk festival and other oudoor activities going on. Huge appreciation of beauty.


We rented bikes and started in a direction away from the beach... which was really perfection... no real reason to leave the area. My husband said, “Let’s go back (to the beach)!” I said, “Just one more street...I want to see something.” More Curiosity. We had no idea what would await us. We came over a hill and discovered what seemed like hundreds of outdoor restaurants, endless shops, and beautiful tree lined streets with bike lanes against a back drop of a gorgeous blue sky, mountains, and 75 degree weather! Appreciation of Beauty. We learned it was FIESTA weekend, and there was a party going on with thousands of visitors. We LOVED every minute we were there.

If we had turned around, we’d have missed the fun discovery of this beautiful part of the town, and the amazing joyful people.

If I hadn’t stopped to ask questions of a local (more curiosity), we’d never have seen this RAT, CAT, AND DOG with their homeless owner. YES, it is real. Unbelievable. I’ve never seen anything like it.

The owner’s answer as to how he gets them to do that? “Animals are simple, people are complicated.”

No doubt, we are complicated. But what I know for sure, is that if you go outside the box and open up youself to new experiences, joy is there for the taking. I am grateful (gratitude) that my husband has been my spontaneous, joyous partner in taking on life for the last 27 years! Tomorrow when I have to take on the medical world with some unexpected surgery, I will have some great memories to use when I need to change my focus.

Coaching questions:
What are the things you love? What gives you energy? How can you balance the good with the not so good in your life?

Make sure to not put off, what you’ve been meaning to do, TODAY!

The field of Positive Psychology has given way to the study of what makes us thrive. Some great research has shown us, that as human beings we share certain positive traits, no matter where in the world one lives! Below is an example of the description of Signature Strengths you will get when you take the VIA Signature Strengths Questionnaire at the www.AuthenticHappiness.com website at University of Pennsylvania. You can take the test free of change. You’ll want to find new ways to use your strengths regularly, because research has shown you can improve your overall happiness by doing so! See the book “Authentic Happiness” as well for further information.

Bravery and valor
You are a courageous person who does not shrink from threat, challenge, difficulty, or
pain. You speak up for what is right even if there is opposition. You act on your
convictions.

Curiosity and interest in the world
You are curious about everything. You are always asking questions, and you find all
subjects and topics fascinating. You like exploration and discovery.

Gratitude
You are aware of the good things that happen to you, and you never take them for
granted. Your friends and family members know that you are a grateful person
because you always take the time to express your thanks.

Honesty, authenticity, and genuineness
You are an honest person, not only by speaking the truth but by living your life in a
genuine and authentic way. You are down to earth and without pretense; you are a
"real" person.

Fairness, equity, and justice
Treating all people fairly is one of your abiding principles. You do not let your
personal feelings bias your decisions about other people. You give everyone a
chance.

Appreciation of beauty and excellence
You notice and appreciate beauty, excellence, and/or skilled performance in all
domains of life, from nature to art to mathematics to science to everyday experience.

Creativity, ingenuity, and originality
Thinking of new ways to do things is a crucial part of who you are. You are never
content with doing something the conventional way if a better way is possible.

Zest, enthusiasm, and energy
Regardless of what you do, you approach it with excitement and energy. You never
do anything halfway or halfheartedly. For you, life is an adventure.

Love of learning
You love learning new things, whether in a class or on your own. You have always
loved school, reading, and museums-anywhere and everywhere there is an
opportunity to learn.

Capacity to love and be loved
You value close relations with others, in particular those in which sharing and caring

Forgiveness and mercy
You forgive those who have done you wrong. You always give people a second
chance. Your guiding principle is mercy and not revenge.

Hope, optimism, and future-mindedness
You expect the best in the future, and you work to achieve it. You believe that the
future is something that you can control.

Judgment, critical thinking, and open-mindedness
Thinking things through and examining them from all sides are important aspects of
who you are. You do not jump to conclusions, and you rely only on solid evidence to
make your decisions. You are able to change your mind.

Kindness and generosity
You are kind and generous to others, and you are never too busy to do a favor. You
enjoy doing good deeds for others, even if you do not know them well.

Spirituality, sense of purpose, and faith
You have strong and coherent beliefs about the higher purpose and meaning of the
universe. You know where you fit in the larger scheme. Your beliefs shape your
actions and are a source of comfort to you.

Leadership
You excel at the tasks of leadership: encouraging a group to get things done and
preserving harmony within the group by making everyone feel included. You do a
good job organizing activities and seeing that they happen.

Humor and playfulness
You like to laugh and tease. Bringing smiles to other people is important to you. You
try to see the light side of all situations.

Citizenship, teamwork, and loyalty
You excel as a member of a group. You are a loyal and dedicated teammate, you
always do your share, and you work hard for the success of your group.

Industry, diligence, and perseverance
You work hard to finish what you start. No matter the project, you "get it out the door"
in timely fashion. You do not get distracted when you work, and you take satisfaction
in completing tasks.

Perspective (wisdom)
Although you may not think of yourself as wise, your friends hold this view of you.
They value your perspective on matters and turn to you for advice. You have a way of
looking at the world that makes sense to others and to yourself.

Caution, prudence, and discretion
You are a careful person, and your choices are consistently prudent ones. You do not
say or do things that you might later regret.

Social intelligence
You are aware of the motives and feelings of other people. You know what to do to fit
in to different social situations, and you know what to do to put others at ease.

Self-control and self-regulation
You self-consciously regulate what you feel and what you do. You are a disciplined
person. You are in control of your appetites and your emotions, not vice versa.

Modesty and humility
You do not seek the spotlight, preferring to let your accomplishments speak for
themselves. You do not regard yourself as special, and others recognize and value
your modesty.

The new field of Positive Psychology led by Martin Seligman, PhD, former president of the American Psychological Association, has taught us a lot about what makes humans flourish. Instead of the historic focus of psychology which concerned itself with pathology and mental illness, this new science focuses on what makes humans feel fulfilled, engaged and meaningfully happy.
He says there are three components of happiness: pleasure, engagement, and meaning. Interestingly, pleasure is the least important component to happiness. The most satisfied people are those that orient their pursuits towards all three. Increasing positive emotions (happiness) leads to positive actions. Happy people are more likely to engage in healthy lifestyle behaviors. Makes sense.
So in the future, I will be writing about how we can improve our happiness by sharing some of the researched activities/exercises that build positive emotion! To start, I've categorized my blog with my top signature strengths (and a couple other categories thrown in). I look forward to writing under each of those topics. A recent study showed that when people used their top strengths in a new way every day, even for a week, their happiness improved up to 6 months over a control group. To find yours, go to www.authentichappiness.org and take the VIA Signature Strengths test.